Let it be known that, while I do have my biases, I'm open to all sorts of horror. Gothic ghost stories, slow burning arthouse tales, Hollywood big-budget flix, gore-fests, and everything in between: I'll give pretty much anything a chance given the availability, and that includes independent, no-budget, bargain-bin-fillers. You know the type. Back in the day, you'd see these filling up an actual bargain bin: films that you've never heard of that are there mostly to fill inventory space. Well, those haven't disappeared, they've just changed media: they're now filling inventory space on streaming services. When Netflix owned that market, you'd find these littering the horror section; now that Netflix has divested itself of a lot of material over the years, those space-fillers have migrated to the bowels of YouTube, Tubi, and Amazon Prime, to name a few. While I've done a few reviews of a similar vein in the past--specifically: You Can't Kill Stephen King, Hank Boyd is Dead, Panman, and CarousHELL--I've opted to collect those into a new series called the Trash Panda Files. Like the mask-wearing mammal who frequently mucks about in human garbage, I, too, will be sifting through the various horror movie trash piles around the net to see if there's something, anything worth watching.
Late Fee is another accidental anthology to add to the list for this Spooktober season. The film follows a couple of horror-enthusiasts who are desperately searching for something really scary to watch since it's Halloween. They arrive at Rare Flix, a video store that prides itself on having those hard to find, underground horror films. After convincing the owner, a diet-cola Lloyd Kaufman, to let them in, the couple argue over what to watch. Thankfully, the other costumed guests in the store are happy to help before they depart for their spooky shindig, and wouldn't you know it: they recommend some gnarly stuff. The owner, dressed as the Devil, tries in vain to dissuade them, but they, like, really want to get spooked. Upon checking them out, the devilish owner makes them sign a hundred page contract while talking about their late fee policy: they must be returned by the stroke of midnight...or else! You catching the fairly thick foreshadowing yet?
The couple's antics create the anthology's wrap-around plot. We then get to follow them into their apartment--where they've covered up every inch of one wall in like the same 4 horror movie posters--and then get to watch the totally spooky videos they've rented. There are two of them, but I've already forgotten their titles. One is about a guy who hires a prostitute, goes into a bizarrely managed motel, and finds out that the escort is about ready to escort him...to HELL! It's a fairly short story with a surprisingly creative payoff, specifically in their succubus redesign. It's nothing overly scary, though surprising given how heavily it leans into the realm of body horror. We then move on to the second story about a woman who is falsely imprisoned in a Satanic detention center. There, she meets the other women who were falsely detained, and then gets out on furlough by a sleazy porn director who shows his true colors as a sleazy porn director with a heart of gold. It's way too long and there's only one noteworthy scene, but even that's done in a way that's more goofy than it is mortifying. We return back to our lovers only to find out that they've missed their return deadline! Oh no! What's that very ominous late fee warning going to look like?
Spoiler: it's basically what you see on the poster.
Is Late Fee a diamond in the rough, a nugget of gold in the garbage? No. You might enjoy it with some friends after a few choice substances or if you're looking to have something fairly tame on in the background; other than that, the only real enjoyment you'll get out of the film is the climax of the first story, which was admittedly pretty surprising, but it's not really worth the time investment to get there.
Overall Score: 2 out of 5 Chads racing back to Rare Flix as the clock counts down to midnight. Did Late Fee scare you? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!
Name : Shevenge Directed By : Various--check the IMDB page linked below, as each of the segments in the anthology were directed by a different director. Subgenre : Anthology Series : Spooktober 2019 entry #10; review #41 Review : Shevenge is an anthology of horror shorts entirely directed by women and centered around the central concept of women seeking out vengeance against those that have wronged them in some way--shevengeance, if you will. The film is broken up into 12ish stories (if we include the sign off from the mostly unnecessary Hostess character leading us through the various entries and segments) that are loosely tied into four over-arching themes: Kiss and Kill, Murderous Moms, Anger Management, and Love You to Pieces. After watching the similarly titled and themed Prevenge , I knew I had to check this one out. Now, that motivation was also spurred on by the fairly glaring reviews against the film that, frankly, come off as a notably misogyn...
Name : Tigers Are Not Afraid Directed By : Issa López Subgenre : Foreign, Fantasy, Thriller Series : Spooktober 2020 entry #20; review #82 Review : Let me start by saying that I love this movie. It's a multi-layered modern day ghost story / fairy tale fusion that's as uncompromising as it is creative. I absolutely want to gush about this movie, but doing so would rob each of you of a more pure, first-time experience with the film. Stop what you're doing and go watch it, then come back here, finish the review, and then leave me a comment. So, while my reviews tend already be fairly succinct, this review will be even shorter than usual. Hey, we've all got those days. But seriously, go watch it and then tell me how wrong (or right) I am. Tigers Are Not Afraid is a Mexican film about a young girl, who happens to be gifted with three wishes, as she joins with a group of kids who have all made orphans by the local cartel. Given the mix of dark whimsy and even bl...
Name : Absentia Directed By : Mike Flanagan Subgenre : Creature Feature Thriller Series : Spooktober 2021 entry #18; review #111 Review : Mike Flanagan is so hot right now. You may already know this from my review (or literally anyone else's, as there's no dearth of opinions floating around the internet) of Midnight Mass , or you may know Flanagan from his work on Doctor Sleep, Oculus, The Haunting of Hill House and/or Bly Manor ; either way, putting his name on a horror project is like printing money. And that's largely due to him proving how original and creative his visions are, so I wanted to go back and check on his first foray into the realm of horror: 2011's Absentia . Absentia is a good film, but it's not without it's flaws. After binging Midnight Mass before checking this one out, it's fun to see just how much Flanagan has grown as a writer and director. Originally funded via a Kickstarter campaign, Absentia follows Tricia as she tak...
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